Alchemy begins with a mess, with garbage and waste, the alchemical massa confusa, the bloody mess which is the raw material, the prima materia of the golden self. Ego does not help much in this matter, since it prefers neatness. , To ego cleanliness is next to godliness. Ego spends a good deal of its time and energy trying to make life neat and cleaning up the mess we inevitably get ourselves into. But alchemy, a thoroughly non-ego work, suggests that the way to soul is through the mess, not around it or in spite of it. And, according to many alchemists, if you don't have a mess to begin with, you had better work hard to get one.
— Thomas Moore
Ego's preference for tidiness is not merely aesthetic — it is a survival strategy, the soul's oldest anesthetic. The clean life, the managed life, the life where loose ends are tucked away and crises resolved before they can deepen into anything real: this is not virtue, though we dress it that way. Moore is pointing at something Ficino understood through his reading of the alchemists, which is that the prima materia is always already waste, always the thing we have been trying to dispose of. The golden result, whatever that means in a given life, does not come from somewhere else. It comes from that.
What this means practically is uncomfortable. Most of the work people call spiritual development is, at bottom, a better cleaning system — more sophisticated, more internally consistent, but still aimed at reduction of the mess. Alchemy refuses that aim at the root. It says the mess is the material, which means that anyone who has successfully avoided catastrophe, disorder, or confusion is not ahead of the process but behind it, still waiting for the prima materia to arrive. The invitation Moore is transmitting from Ficino is genuinely strange: if you don't yet have a mess, go find one. The gold is not waiting on the other side of cleanliness.
Thomas Moore·The Planets Within: The Astrological Psychology of Marsilio Ficino·1982