Women of this type, though continually "living for others," are, as a matter of fact, unable to make any real sacrifice. Driven by ruthless will to power and a fanatical insistence on their own maternal rights, they often succeed in annihilating not only their own personality but also the personal lives of their children. The less conscious such a mother is of her own personality, the greater and the more violent is her unconscious will to power. For many such women Baubo rather than Demeter would be the appropriate symbol. The mind is not cultivated for its own sake but usually remains in its original condition, altogether primitive, unrelated, and ruthless, but also as true, and sometimes as profound, as Nature herself.
— Carl Gustav Jung
Jung is describing something the sentimental surface of maternity conceals almost perfectly: that self-erasure and domination can be the same gesture. The woman who "lives for others" and thereby empties herself of any declared selfhood has not dissolved her will — she has made it invisible, which is considerably more dangerous than owning it. An acknowledged will can be argued with. An unconscious one speaks through love, through sacrifice, through "I only want what's best for you," and leaves no handhold for the child to push against.
The Baubo reference is doing real work here. Demeter grieves and searches — she is suffering and desire made visible. Baubo's obscenity broke Demeter's fast precisely because it refused sublimation; it brought the body back before all the elevated feeling. Jung is suggesting that the woman who cannot acknowledge her Baubo-nature — crude, chthonic, stubbornly particular — slides by default into a maternity that feeds on those it appears to nourish. The ratio of the mother, the logic that love received will finally end suffering, has here found its underside: when the one who offers love is herself running on the same logic, demanding love's return through the form of need, the exchange never closes. No one gets fed. The children leave — or they stay, which is worse.
Carl Gustav Jung·The Archetypes and the Collective Unconscious·1959