The Seba library treats Demand in 9 passages, across 5 authors (including Wilson, Bill, Lacan, Jacques, Kurtz, Ernest).
my dependency meant demand — a demand for the possession and control of the people and the conditions surrounding me.
Wilson establishes ‘demand’ as the psychological mechanism translating dependency into coercive control over others, making it the central pathology of emotional immaturity in recovery.
, The Next Frontier: Emotional Sobriety, 1958thesis
what is in question in analysis is nothing other than the bringing to light of the manifestation of the desire of the subject… the demand is not explicit, that it is even much more than implicit, that it is hidden for the subject
Lacan distinguishes demand from desire by arguing that demand is always concealed from the subject and must be interpreted rather than simply answered, making its clarification the central work of analysis.
, The Seminar of Jacques Lacan, Book VIII: Transference, 2015thesis
it is when the demand of the subject has been introjected, has passed as an articulated demand into the one who is its recipient, in such a fashion that it represents his own demand in an inverted form… that we find the strongest effects which are called hypersevere effects of the superego.
Lacan traces the genesis of the punishing superego to the structural inversion of demand between subject and Other, linking the concept directly to clinical phenomena of self-punishment.
, The Seminar of Jacques Lacan, Book VIII: Transference, 2015thesis
the exact nature of the danger in ‘demand;’ and… the special pitfall for the alcoholic of the contradictory two-pronged quest for both ‘dependence’ and ‘independence.’
Kurtz identifies ‘demand’ as one of three key dangers in Wilson’s analysis of alcoholic character, situating it between the poles of dependency and the illusion of self-sufficiency.
, Not God A History of Alcoholics Anonymous, 2010thesis
the desire of the neurotic is characterised as pregenital… It reposes entirely on the effect of the demand of the Other. The Other decides about it, and indeed it is here that we find the root of this dependency of the neurotic.
Lacan locates neurotic desire’s pregenital character in its total subjection to the demand of the Other, establishing demand as the structural root of neurotic dependency.
, The Seminar of Jacques Lacan, Book VIII: Transference, 2015supporting
To the extent that we fulfill the demand which the division of labor involves, providing for the good of others, we are on the path beyond economism.
Sardello reframes demand as a soul-ethical imperative within labor, arguing that fulfilling the demand of social interdependence constitutes the path out of self-serving economism.
, Facing the World with Soul: The Reimagination of Modern Life, 1992supporting
The word ‘selfish’ ordinarily implies that one is acquisitive, demanding, and thoughtless of the welfare of others.
Kurtz documents Wilson’s careful differentiation between healthy self-interest and destructive demandingness, showing that the latter constitutes the pathological selfishness AA targets.
, Not God A History of Alcoholics Anonymous, 2010supporting
the unhealthy dependency that was underlying your emotional reaction… ‘My welfare and safety depends on how other people drive.’
Berger operationalizes Wilson’s concept of demand-as-dependency by offering clinical exercises that surface the hidden ‘unhealthy dependency’ beneath reactive emotional states.
, 12 Smart Things to Do When the Booze and Drugs Are Gone: Choosing Emotional Sobriety through Self-Awareness and Right Action, 2010supporting
the basic quest in Alcoholics Anonymous was to be for balance, for some middle course or happy medium… ‘The charting of a safe path between these extremes’ thus became the life task
Kurtz contextualizes the AA response to demand within a broader psychology of excess and denial, framing recovery as the navigation between compulsive acting-out and repression.
, Not God A History of Alcoholics Anonymous, 2010aside